Do you have any good idea about your family tree? Have you worked on it? Have you been to familysearch.org or ancestry.com? Do you have 40 birth certificates, 20 death certificates, a dozen draft cards, pictures in black and white?
We do. We also have a MESS and a half!
See, we found out when doing our family tree that we’re not the only adoption-minded people. In fact, we’re not the only ones who have taken in non-related family (sans adoption) either. We’re not the only ones who know about abandonment. We’re not the only ones who have done things a little differently.
Okay, so let’s try this. Here are a few stories.
First, you probably have read a few things about my children. Tumbler is 7. Swimmer is 6. T-lo is 5. They came to us through fostercare. We never had heard of them before. We didn’t know their family. I had never even heard of their town or county. So they were complete strangers who have become our daughter and sons.
Second, my hubby was adopted. Did you know that? His stepfather adopted him and all of his siblings when he was little. His biological father died when my husband was only six weeks old (there is a story there. Well, possibly two. Or three? The world may never know what REALLY happened).
#3 – OKay, here is an interesting story though. My husband’s biological grandfather…He was born in 1901 to a young mom named Lena. His father died that year (weird, coincidence). Anyway, his mother couldn’t care for him at first so he was in a children’s home for a short time. Later, she got him back and married another man. This man took my hubby’s grandfather as his own. What is weird is that I can’t find anything about his(the grandfather’s) biological father and family. Anyway, but that isn’t where the story ends. As you learn more about Lena, you find out that she took in other people also. Sometimes she took in whole families. Other times, she just had a couple extra children. Interesting, huh?
Wait wait…so that is hubby’s side, right?
My father was adopted. Now, we have limited information about it as there seems to have been some “interesting” legal stuff going on and the lawyer who handled it died between the time my father was 14 and wanted to know and 18 when the lawyer said he’d tell him. At some point, my mother got the idea that it was a kinship adoption. BTW, my aunt was also adopted. Both had the same biological and adoptive parents.
So biologically, I have nothing further on my dad’s side.
I was able to get enough information to start following my father’s adoptive father’s family for a little while. It wasn’t a lot, but something. For his mother, I get cut short pretty quickly also. I managed to get my grandmother’s birth certificate which helped with her parent’s names. I got some neat pics of the ship she came over on also. But I have her mom’s name then NOTHING. I found where her husband’s belongings were sent care of her mother’s last name and that is it.
Now my mother’s father’s side of the family is fairly normal as families come. I’m sure there are some stories, of course. But it seems more straight forward. But her mother’s side of the family is less so. Her mother’s age is in question. It seems she has multiple birth dates due to fudging it to join the military with her brother during WWII.
Anyway, I have never been able to find out anything about my grandmother’s father or his family. Unfortunately, the children (my grandmother and her brother) were 3 and 5 by the time of the 1930 census and my great grandmother was living with her mother, father, and siblings. A family member doesn’t mention him at all though there is a paper family tree that names the father of the children.
So I have some lines that go very far though they may not be biological and some that don’t go very far at all, especially if we only use biological lines.
Okay, so I’ve mentioned I have an open adoption with my children’s biological family. So I have slowly used what I could figure out from facebook and other things to put together a beginning of a family tree biologically for my children. I actually have done pretty decently considering! So I forgot to ask MeMe about it when she was here for the adoption party. I texted her, asking some basic questions. She tried to fill me in. Well, last night, when we were talking, she said she was getting the information off the genealogical report for the tribe! WHAT?!?! I immediately thought about how I was glad that hadn’t come out before the adoption. Honestly, had we been told during the placement call, that would have been a deal breaker. Unfortunately, we have heard too many stories of native children not being able to get permanency or ripped from the only home they’ve ever known for no reason other than tribe affiliation. Well, as I researched the information, it probably wouldn’t have mattered. They are from a subsection of Cherokee that is not yet recognized by the BIA. However, the children’s great grandfather and grandmother’s sister are “card carrying” members so it might be nice to look into it.
Anyway, just found some interesting things and I’m glad to be able to provide a biological family tree as well as our family tree for them. They are welcome to fill it in more in time. I’ll also do what I can with MeMe as we go along.
May I get on a small soapbox briefly? I think people doing genealogical research need to be mindful that there are PEOPLE involved. It is neat to find skeletons, noble stories, etc. However, especially in our complicated world, it is wise to simply accept the information as it is known sometimes. There is a young person in our family tree whose family members were bullied by a genealogy-studying extended family member because she thought she remembered some juicy fact about this young person’s biological ties or lack thereof. She was very firmly told that the record available states XYZ. She decided to list this child differently on her family tree. What is odd is that she accepted the adopted child of the family. So say there were three children. She listed the one biological child and the one adopted child the same, but listed this third child differently. How RUDE!
I really enjoy doing our family tree. I can’t dedicate much time to it; but here and there, I try.